My Diary At Thirteen

Dear Diary,

Well tomorrow is the last time I'll see Matthew. School finished 3 days ago. I'm just sitting here listening to one of my favorite songs by Delta. Delta Goodrem has to be my all time hero, my insperation and rolemodel. The song at the moment is called "Not Me, Not I". It's such a beautiful song. I got her CD for christmas from Lauren. From Monique I got a statue of a cat and from Karrine I just got a card, suprise suprise. Oops better change the song. I don't like this one. There. Oh joy, this song always gets me into that moppy mood.

It always reminds me I'll never see you know who again. (sigh) His, like, the last person in this universe who'd really like me. I wish I was more lucky. I must be the un-luckiest human on the planet. I know who's the luckiest. Wade's girlfriend. Like, duh, of course she'd be the only girl who can get a guy like him. OK, if I had 5 wishes they'd be:

1. Lots of money
2. Good Looks
3. Smart
4. Humor
5. Wade not having a girlfriend (of course)

Anyway, let's see if they'll come true. Being positive never hurt anyone, did it? I have to catch Matt by himself tomorrow so I can talk to him. (sigh) Today was exactly a week since we kissed. Oh well, better hit the sack.

Wish me luck for tomorrow, Danielle

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Sadly, and ever so tragically, my life's about as free of real love today as it was when I wrote this diary entry six years ago. My life isn't pathetic; I have good friends, supportive family, a little black cat on my lap and steaming coffee waiting in the pot. But something's missing ... it always is isn't it. It dosn't help that I want that - the kind of love you read about. Once again your telling yourself that Mansfield Park is just a book - sadly. There can't possibly be an Edmund Bertram or Asamoto Soshi out there for you.

Coffee is my substitute though.